Why do we always have this picture in our head of how our lives are supposed to be or how it is supposed to turn out? We are just torturing ourselves.
If you are like me, I am always trying to figure out what I am doing wrong and how to get the picture in my head to become a reality. What do I need to change? What choices do I need to make to get there?
Why do we do this? Why can't we just accept our realities and be happy with what we have? We should. We should live life as it is and not wish or hope for it to be different. We should be happy with the life we do have because it is the one we were given.
Notice I am saying "should". As I am writing this, I am thinking about that other life - the one I sometimes wish I had. The one with the house with the big yard, the great guy who will snuggle on the couch with me watching movies after a hard day, the dog that is always excited to see me no matter what, and the friends that we meet for dinner once a week just to catch up. Wanting these things is one of my biggest flaws. I always want more, something different. I can tell myself to stop, to be happy with what I have, but it isn’t that easy. I should be happy that I am alive and healthy and that just becasue I don't have any of those things doesn’t mean the stuff I do have is somehow not good enough. I tell myself to be proud of who I am and to love what I have, but a part of me will always want the other life.
I think this is partially because of the age we live in. We live in the technology age where there is always going to be something bigger, something different, or something newer. Take for example the iPhone. Just as we get acquainted with the new version, they are introducing another one. They promise all these new features and we have to have it. Life is the same. When we were younger, we wished to be older; however, when we get there we realized that maybe being a kid wasn’t that bad after all. We sometimes wish we could go back and appreciate it more, but it’s too late. The reality is we are adults now with adult responsibilities. We upgrade to the new iPhone only to realize that underneath it is still the same phone. It still makes calls, still has apps, why does the color or size of it matter? It shouldn’t matter, but for some unknown reason it does.
We know in reality that sometimes happily ever after doesn’t exist and the grass isn't always greener on the other side, but somehow we hold on to hope that it is. We believe that if we do this, this, and this we will get where we want to be. And maybe we will, but what happens when we are so busy trying to get to Point B that we miss everything that is happing at Point A? We are missing out on life trying to get to somewhere that has no guarantees. Is it really worth it?
We need to start living in the moment and enjoying the world around us. In no way am I saying we should give up on that other life or the different life. In fact, I am saying the opposite. It is always okay to have hope that things will change for the better; we just have to accept the reality that sometimes it may not. We shouldn’t be so focused on the other life that we miss out on the one we have. We have to focus on the present and have hopes and dreams for the future. I may still get my house, my guy, and my dog someday. And I may not. Life is unpredictable.
In the meantime, I am not going to miss out on possibly taking my little cousin to the aquarium this weekend or finishing my novel to focus on gaining that other life. I am going to continue with those things and hope that somewhere down the line my dreams will become reality. I will take steps toward my other life without missing the stepping stones or flowers along the path to this other place. I am also going to find a way to live in this life and make the most of it without giving up on my dreams.
Does this sound like something we could all do? Can we get together and focus on the now, but still have hope for the future? Can we stop becoming so focused on the other life that we miss out on the one we have? Does that sound possible? I am not going to say it will be easy, because we will always want something different. It’s the way we're wired. It’s our reality. New and “better” things will always come along, but do we really need them to be happy?
I hope I gave you some things to think about and if you have ever felt like this, let me know in the comments section or any of my social media sites linked above. Am I the only one who feels this way? What are your thoughts? Let’s talk about it.
Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day!
Why do we do this? Why can't we just accept our realities and be happy with what we have? We should. We should live life as it is and not wish or hope for it to be different. We should be happy with the life we do have because it is the one we were given.
Notice I am saying "should". As I am writing this, I am thinking about that other life - the one I sometimes wish I had. The one with the house with the big yard, the great guy who will snuggle on the couch with me watching movies after a hard day, the dog that is always excited to see me no matter what, and the friends that we meet for dinner once a week just to catch up. Wanting these things is one of my biggest flaws. I always want more, something different. I can tell myself to stop, to be happy with what I have, but it isn’t that easy. I should be happy that I am alive and healthy and that just becasue I don't have any of those things doesn’t mean the stuff I do have is somehow not good enough. I tell myself to be proud of who I am and to love what I have, but a part of me will always want the other life.
I think this is partially because of the age we live in. We live in the technology age where there is always going to be something bigger, something different, or something newer. Take for example the iPhone. Just as we get acquainted with the new version, they are introducing another one. They promise all these new features and we have to have it. Life is the same. When we were younger, we wished to be older; however, when we get there we realized that maybe being a kid wasn’t that bad after all. We sometimes wish we could go back and appreciate it more, but it’s too late. The reality is we are adults now with adult responsibilities. We upgrade to the new iPhone only to realize that underneath it is still the same phone. It still makes calls, still has apps, why does the color or size of it matter? It shouldn’t matter, but for some unknown reason it does.
We know in reality that sometimes happily ever after doesn’t exist and the grass isn't always greener on the other side, but somehow we hold on to hope that it is. We believe that if we do this, this, and this we will get where we want to be. And maybe we will, but what happens when we are so busy trying to get to Point B that we miss everything that is happing at Point A? We are missing out on life trying to get to somewhere that has no guarantees. Is it really worth it?
We need to start living in the moment and enjoying the world around us. In no way am I saying we should give up on that other life or the different life. In fact, I am saying the opposite. It is always okay to have hope that things will change for the better; we just have to accept the reality that sometimes it may not. We shouldn’t be so focused on the other life that we miss out on the one we have. We have to focus on the present and have hopes and dreams for the future. I may still get my house, my guy, and my dog someday. And I may not. Life is unpredictable.
In the meantime, I am not going to miss out on possibly taking my little cousin to the aquarium this weekend or finishing my novel to focus on gaining that other life. I am going to continue with those things and hope that somewhere down the line my dreams will become reality. I will take steps toward my other life without missing the stepping stones or flowers along the path to this other place. I am also going to find a way to live in this life and make the most of it without giving up on my dreams.
Does this sound like something we could all do? Can we get together and focus on the now, but still have hope for the future? Can we stop becoming so focused on the other life that we miss out on the one we have? Does that sound possible? I am not going to say it will be easy, because we will always want something different. It’s the way we're wired. It’s our reality. New and “better” things will always come along, but do we really need them to be happy?
I hope I gave you some things to think about and if you have ever felt like this, let me know in the comments section or any of my social media sites linked above. Am I the only one who feels this way? What are your thoughts? Let’s talk about it.
Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day!